Being Prepared for Surgery

Before we go any further, you should know that this blog post does not contain any medical advice. There are no exercises, no medications (or alternative remedies), no recommendations for tests or monitoring, and no diet guidelines.

So, if this isn't a medical guide, what is it?

This is a list of things that I do in the days or weeks before planned surgery to make my life easier in the days and weeks after the surgery. Of course, the nature of the surgery will change some things, but I'll try to be as general as possible.

Here in the UK, most people will know their surgery date at least a month in advance (for routine, non-urgent procedures). I like to use that time to think about the effects the surgery may have on my life while I'm recovering, and try to come up with as many solutions as possible before the problems have a chance to rear their ugly heads!

In my opinion, there is almost nothing worse than feeling weak and feeble, in pain, limited by wounds/dressings/plaster casts. Add to that the feeling of unwashed hair and skin, unwanted body hair, and flaking nails, and it's almost a recipe for disaster! Here are a few of the things that I do to prepare my body for surgery and to keep myself looking as normal as possible afterwards.

Hair:

Book a haircut as close to the date of your surgery as humanly possible - this will ensure that your hair looks as good as possible, even if you're not able to give it much attention. If you have very long, thick or curly hair, consider a change of style to one that needs minimal maintenance. This doesn't always mean short! My hair is wavy/curly and prone to frizz. Short styles, for me, mean endless conditioning and styling products and hours of blowdrying or using straightening irons or tongs. With a blunt cut just above shoulder length, I can get away with scrunching a little mousse through my hair and leaving it to dry naturally.

If your hair is coloured, make sure you get your roots done, preferably just before surgery, so that it will look fresh for as long as possible while you recover and build up enough energy to get to the salon for the next colour!

Styling your hair may be another hurdle, especially if the surgery affects your hands/arms/shoulders, or is likely to leave you feeling very weak. I recommend investing in the following basic kit:
1. Dry shampoo: Having hair that looks bouncy and freshly-washed without getting out of bed is like a miracle! If possible, try a couple of brands and stock up on cans of your favourite in various sizes. You may still need help to apply it, massage it in and brush it out again, but it still takes considerably less effort for both you and your helper than a full shampoo and conditioner, plus it doesn't leave your hair wet, so no risk of getting chilled (or getting wet bedclothes)
2. Alice bands and 'crocodile' clips: These are enough to hold your hair back from your face, even if you have one hand out of action. Some people find the fabric bands easier than solid ones, but I'm a fan of the solid ones. The wider the better, in order to cover as much hair as possible! Having the crocodile clips as well means that you can try out a variety of styles with minimal effort or assistance
3. A wide-toothed comb is great for gentle hair-styling (or just detangling); if you can get one with a long handle, so much the better!

If your surgery means that blowdrying your hair is not an option, there are two things you can do. The first is to resign yourself to having a different style for a few weeks, working with your natural hair texture. As you'll be giving your hair a break from heated styling tools, it's a good opportunity to use intensive deep conditioners. Put a soft towel over your pillow and apply the conditioner. Massage your scalp well, and then comb the conditioner through to the ends of your hair. It can stay there until you next wash your hair. Not particularly glamourous or attractive, but your hair will be in better condition afterwards! The other option is to book a course of regular blow-dry treatments at your hairdressing salon. It's a lovely thing to do to pamper yourself, and may be the only way to get your hair washed and styled properly if you have an arm in a cast, but consider how you're going to get to and from the salon if you're not up to walking and not allowed to drive.

Skin:

After surgery, you may not feel like keeping up with your usual skincare regime. I like to cleanse, tone and moisturise, and have various favourite products to exfoliate and moisturise my skin. This all goes out of the window after any surgery, but especially if I have an arm in plaster. Simple cleansing wipes are my saving grace - they remove everything (even betadine, chlorhexidine and EEG glue - all of which you may encounter during your hospital stay!), and leave my skin feeling lovely. At a pinch, you could use them to wash your body, but I wouldn't recommend doing this more than once! My top five tips for skin have to be:
1. If you wax, book a wax prior to your surgery: If you don't wax, think about whether you're going to keep up with whatever method you normally use, and whether it would bother you if you didn't keep up with it. Waxing lasts for 4-6 weeks for most people, and there's nothing quite like feeling smooth and polished when you're a bit weak.
2. Simple cleansing wipes
3. A pleasantly fragranced deodorant (I find spray easier than any other method of application)
4. A real sponge and a mild liquid soap: it's hard to rinse properly if you're washing in bed or in a chair, but it's not the end of the world if a mild soap stays on your skin - aqueous cream can be used instead of liquid soap - it doesn't feel particularly 'cleansing' but it does work, and it'll leave your skin lovely and soft
5. A luxurious moisturiser: it may be more difficult to apply, but having the luxury of my favourite scent as well as soft skin is worth the time it takes to apply it! There are lots of different types of moisturiser, depending on your needs - it may be easier to use a body butter that's almost solid and won't run everywhere, a pump dispenser, or a spray.

Cosmetic:

More than any other part of me, my face gives me away after surgery. It takes almost nothing to make me look pale and drawn, with dark circles around my eyes, and it is guaranteed to make me feel worse if I see myself in the mirror looking like that. Of course, there's always the option to just avoid the mirror, but let's assume that we generally like mirrors.

Before surgery:
1. Shape your eyebrows and wax/thread/pluck any stray hairs
2. Get your eyelashes tinted: this is cheap and readily available at salons, and will mean that you don't need to wear mascara for up to six weeks. I have no arguments for the pedants who say that you don't need to wear mascara anyway. I like to have dark lashes, and drawing attention to my lashes and big green/blue eyes is better than drawing attention to the dark circles around my eyes!
3. Invest in a cream blush, or even better, a cream product for cheeks and lips: I love the Benefit Benetint lip and cheek balm and Bobbi Brown's Pot Rouge in Powder Pink. Give me 30 seconds with either of these, and I'll magically transform into a healthy-looking creature before your very eyes.
4. Get a really good brightening concealer for under-eye bags and any other dark shadows that may emerge post-surgery: My intention is not really to promote lots of beauty products, but I use Clinique's Airbrush Concealer. I've used it for many years, and love it. It is also very easy to apply. Even with one hand. Even if that hand is your non-dominant hand.
5. Stock up on moisturiser and lip balm: Hospitals are dry places, and my skin is dry and flaky for days or even weeks afterwards, so I use a much heavier moisturiser than usual.
6. Choose some low-profile jewellery to wear while you're recovering: You'll probably have to remove all your jewellery for the surgery (you may be allowed to tape over a wedding band) but you'll need something simple to wear afterwards, if only to maintain piercings (don't forget about belly buttons, tongues, lips, etc. and make sure you have someone ready to put them back in for you after surgery if you can't do it yourself). I usually wear plain pearl or diamond stud earrings, a simple, light necklace, and my wedding and engagement rings, but no other jewellery. It's enough to keep me looking polished, and to keep the holes in my earlobes open, and that's all I need.

After surgery:
Get a manicure and pedicure: Don't make the mistake of doing this prior to surgery, as you'll just have to take it off, which is a bit of a nightmare if you have a gel or shellac manicure. Once you're safely out of the hospital, book yourself in for a mani-pedi, preferably with gel or shellac polish, which lasts for a couple of weeks without chipping or flaking. I like to get a bright colour on my feet and a neutral colour on my hands - it does have to go with everything for two weeks, after all! If you're not well enough to go out for your manicure, you may be able to find a mobile technician who will come to your home, or even to the hospital.

After all this preparation, I'm sure you're just about ready to just get to the hospital so that you can have a break, but three last things:
1. Order some pretty seasonal flowers to be delivered a couple of days after you get home from hospital (unless you're likely to be inundated with floral gifts from friends), or buy yourself an orchid in bud, so that it'll flower when you get home and are there to see it.
2. Put fresh sheets on your bed ready for when you get back. If you're anything like me, this thought will sustain you through the hard first night in the hospital after surgery. I tell myself that I just have to get through this night (and maybe a couple of others) and then I can go home and snuggle into my lovely soft bed with the clean, fresh sheets, and that means that Everything Will Be Alright.

Is it ok to be scared?

Of course it's ok to be scared.

Life is a great adventure, but it's understandable to feel apprehensive about pain, other symptoms, disease progression and even death.

The problems really arise when the fear and apprehension become so all-encompassing that they eclipse all other feelings. Every day can hold so many fearful opportunities, and life loses some of its sparkle when we lose sight of the reasons it is worth living.

 I know that I will probably die younger than most of my friends. I don't want to miss out on anything, but by focusing on my grief at having a shortened life expectancy, rather than on the opportunities in each day, that's exactly what I'm doing.

One of the ways that allows me to enjoy each day is to control my symptoms. By taking control of monitoring my conditions (even when this involves tedious blood testing or time-consuming calculations of fluid balance) and taking the right doses of the right medications at the right time, I am giving my body the best possible chance to perform when I want to do fun stuff.

Part of this relates to acceptance - acceptance is not just recognising the name and impact of your condition. On the other hand, it is also not about making illness (or recovery) the whole focus of your life. There has to be a balance between living with the condition and living despite the condition.

Fear is one of those things that can seriously get in the way of living a productive life despite illness.

For me, the first step is to recognise the things that make me anxious - there are almost always ways to get around these things, whether it's ringing ahead to a restaurant to discuss appropriate food choices to avoid anxiety on facing the menu, working with therapists to increase strength and range of movement, or discussing better pain management strategies with your Dream Team.

I'm scared of having long-term lines (IV and a feeding tube) - the responsibility of possible infection, the cosmetic implications (not that I've ever been a bikini girl!), the pain associated with insertion, and all the kit that I'll have to learn to use at home. I'm also scared that I can't deny the effects that this illness is having on my body - no more pretending that I'm perfectly healthy!

Thankfully, I don't have much of a choice in the matter of the tubes, so I'm just going to have to bite the bullet, put on my Big Girl Panties and deal with it. Focusing on the positives is going to be my strategy of choice - I'll be able to spend less time in hospital for a start! Obviously (because I love lists) I also have a list of fun things that I'd like to do once I have some calories inside me, and therefore some energy!

Am I still scared?

Yes, of course I am. Having a list of fun things to do and lots of lovely people to share these activities doesn't take away the reality of daily symptoms and possible future declines. What it does do, however, is remind me that however dark it may seem under my own personal grey cloud, if I make enough of an effort, there's always a silver lining to be found.

Acute and Chronic

After writing the last entry (about action plans - here if you missed it), I continued to think about what happens when chronic illnesses flare up enough for me to need help. How to identify the acute exacerbations of my chronic conditions and separate them out from the normal fluctuations of the conditions.

Actually, with asthma, it's relatively easy because there's something to measure. I can stagger into my local A&E and tell them (in between gasps) that my peak flow is 100, and everyone will agree that I need to be in hospital.

With other conditions, though, trying to determine when I need emergency help can be like trying to pin a tail on a moving target. For the record, I definitely do not try to pin anything onto my cat, when she is moving, or otherwise.

Soon after my most recent gastroparesis flare started, almost six weeks ago, my GP recommended that I needed to go to hospital for IV fluids and IV antiemetics (anti-sickness medication) because I had only been managing to keep down about 200 ml per day, was feeling dizzy, and was vomiting. About a week later, we had the same again - I was still vomiting, still struggling to keep fluids down, still feeling dizzy, and was only passing water about once in every 24 hour period.

Almost six weeks on, little has changed. I spent all day yesterday lying absolutely flat in bed because I was so dizzy and nauseous, only getting out of bed to vomit. Today is much the same, though I'm horizontal on the sofa for a bit of variety.

My gut feeling is that I need to go to A&E for a top-up of IV fluids and some antiemetics, but there's no objective measure to which I can point to say why today; why now.

I feel constant, severe nausea, but I felt that yesterday and the day before. I have been nauseous, to some degree, for several years. Why is today different?

I have struggled to take in more than a few hundred calories (most of which I vomit back up) and feel very dehydrated. But I've averaged 500 kcals per day for almost six weeks now. What's so special about today?

My blood pressure is low and my heart rate is high, making me weak, shaky and dizzy - that delicious combination of autonomic dysfunction and dehydration. But I was dehydrated yesterday. There is no measure of dehydration that can tell me why today is the day that I think I need help.

I could wait until tomorrow, but even tomorrow there will still be no standard; no bar below which I might fall, telling me that I must go to hospital. My symptoms tomorrow will probably be the same as my symptoms today, and my uncertainties will be the same.

I picture myself on arrival at the hospital:

Nurse: And how long have you been feeling like this?
Me: About six weeks
Nurse: And why have you come to us today?

That's the question I can't answer. Yes, things are bad; they're worse than yesterday and the day before, but could I continue at home? Yes, I probably could. Would I feel better after some fluids and medication? Yes, but I managed without them yesterday and the day before. It's like playing a giant game of chicken with my health.

I wish that there could be a measurement that would indicate exactly what my body needs. Like a petrol gauge on a car. I feel as though I'm currently running on vapour, but I have no way to check. At a better, calmer time, I need to discuss with my GP and dietician and come up with an action plan, similar to the one that I have for asthma, so that I know, without doubt, when I am safe to continue to cope at home, and when I need help from the professionals. Oh, and we need to come up with a better long-term management plan so that my gastroparesis is better controlled and I don't keep returning to this situation of 'firefighting' the acute problems.

Presently, in the absence of better measurements, I turn to social factors. Do I have important hospital appointments that I need to attend? Do we have plans to see friends or family? Is there anything really important that I need to do in the next 24-48 hours? Can I get to the hospital? Is it raining? Would it be easier to wait until tomorrow?

Applying this to today, I'm supposed to be celebrating my birthday tonight (with Richard) and tomorrow (with my family). As unwell as I am feeling now, I would rather be in an uncomfortable bed in hospital receiving IV fluids and IV antiemetics, surrounded by noisy, drunk and disruptive patients than struggling to stay upright and awake, and not vomit while 'celebrating' with friends and family. That a hospital visit sounds more appealing than birthday cake is enough to tell me that it's probably time for that trip to the hospital.

Taxi!

Being a Helpful Patient

There is certain information that your doctors will always need to know. This can be as simple as your name and address and your PCP's details to more detailed information about your past medical history and the medications that you take.

I have a big medical folder of my own records (known as The Big Red Folder). This is split into sections for letters from specialists, test results, relevant publications and articles, diet sheets, exercise sheets from physio, and all sorts of other useful things. Most of the time this folder lives at home with me. It contains the charts that I showed you last week that I use to keep track of my symptoms and the medications that I take.

I am so grateful that I started compiling my medical paperwork in this way, and have learned lessons from other people with complex medical conditions. One of these lessons is to take time every 6-12 months to write to my doctors and request copies of important test results. It can be so helpful to have an MRI report and the scan itself on CD to show a new doctor, rather than having to take my word for what it showed, or waste time for them to request the results from another specialist. I have so many doctors and other health professionals working with me that it can be really hard to keep track of all the tests and all the results. I am the only person who knows about every test and every appointment, so I feel a sense of responsibility to keep good records.

Right at the front of my Big Red Folder is a section of essential information. This is an 'executive summary' that covers all the most important points in my medical history. I have been asked so often by doctors in the ER if they can borrow/photocopy this executive summary that I now carry spare copies in the folder.

So where to start? Well, think back to the last time you were in the ER. You may remember being asked the same questions over and over by the different people that looked after you. There are certain things that your doctors will always need to know.

My executive summary looks like this:

Page 1:

1. My name, address and date of birth
2. Next of kin details (name and contact number)
3. Details of my GP (name, address, telephone)
4. My height and weight (important for some drug calculations)
5. A list of my most important diagnoses - no details, just the name of the diagnosis

Page 2:

Important contact details:

Name, address and contact details for all the specialists that care for me, including my hospital number (patient reference number) for each hospital/clinic. This list includes bleep numbers and email addresses where relevant. For example, it has the bleep number of the Specialist Registrar on-call for asthma at the Royal Brompton Hospital, which is the specialist lung hospital where I'm treated. If I'm admitted to any other hospital, it can be helpful for them to get in touch with one of my specialists as a matter of urgency.


Page 3:

1. List of current medications and allergies

The allergies are in a highlighted box at the top of the page. On the other side of the page is a list of medications that are contraindicated for people with my conditions. Because I have rare and complex conditions, I would rather tell people the basics again and again than risk them make a mistake with my health because they didn't know.

The rest of the page is taken up with a list of my regular and 'as required' medications. For each medication I have given the generic name (unless it's important for absorption or allergy reasons that I take a particular brand), the dose, the route, the frequency and the reason that I take it.

Make sure to include any medications that you buy over the counter, supplements that you take, and your method of contraception, if appropriate.


Page 4:

Past Medical History:

Just a list of dates and important events. For the sake of brevity, I don't include all hospital admissions, just the things that seem most relevant to me - childhood illnesses, major diagnoses, surgeries.

Page 5:

Family History:

Try to restrict this to immediate family (siblings, parents, grandparents) unless there is an inherited condition that can be seen more clearly by including more family members. Even if you don't have inherited diseases in your family, it's worth noting the causes of death of close family members and the incidence of things like diabetes, cancer and heart/lung disease.

Social History:

This is just a bit about you: 

- Do you smoke (how much and for how many years)?

- Do you drink (what, how much, how often)?

- Do you take any illegal drugs? If so, what and how often?

- Do you live in a house/flat/castle? Are there stairs?

- Do you have pets/children/other dependents?

- Who looks after your care needs if you have any?

- Do you work? What do you do, how many hours do you work?

- Are you right or left handed?

That's about it for my executive summary. Of course, it's not rocket science, but it's amazing how things get forgotten in the heat of the moment. Having a printed, legible list to give to anyone treating you can relieve a lot of the pressure of acute illness (for you and your loved ones) and allow you to focus on getting the treatment you need to get better.

More on The Big Red Folder tomorrow!

That Fine Line

Those of us with chronic illnesses live with symptoms day in and day out. The severity of those symptoms may vary, and some of them may go away from time to time, but we never feel 'well' in the way that we would like.

In order to manage these daily symptoms, many of us have medications and treatments available to us that would usually require hospital admission: home oxygen, intravenous medications, nebulisers, strong medications. These are not cures, just ways of maintaining the status quo and allow us to stay at home with a reasonable quality of life.

Difficulties arise, however, when things deteriorate despite all the medications that we have in our 'chronic illness toolkit'.

How far should we allow things to deteriorate before we 'give in' and accept that we need extra help and support? How long do we wait for the 'rescue' medications that we have to kick in? It may be that the deterioration is gradual, and insidious, and it can seem hard to know the point in the downward trend at which we should seek advice. Worse still, we can get so caught up in just dealing with each moment as it comes that we stop looking at the bigger picture and asking how we are going to improve things.

These are difficult questions for anyone reluctant to 'bother' their doctor (or other health professional), but even more so for people with chronic illnesses. Often, our illnesses are rare, and may be complex. While the necessary treatment may be simple, getting it may be another matter.

Flare-ups often seem to happen at night or at the weekend, especially if it is a holiday weekend. This poses yet another question of whether we try to wait until we can get in touch with our own specialists, or whether we need help sooner than that. I feel as though I am treading a fine line whenever I am in the position of needing to make this decision.

Emergency Departments are not really set up to treat those of us with complex medical conditions. They are very good at what they do, which is to treat accidents and acute illness. It is unfair to expect them to be able to handle rare medical conditions.

Of course, the ideal is to be able to contact one's own specialist for advice and treatment. They are far better placed to be able to tweak routine treatment and instigate new therapies than any healthcare professional meeting you for the first time.

But what happens when you really can't get in touch with your own doctors?

Alternative communication methods:
Telephone and email can be excellent ways to get in touch with your doctors. Email, in particular, allows you to give all the relevant details, taking time to write carefully and accurately, without the panic of an emergency conversation. It also allows you and your doctor to have a written record of the enquiry and any advice given.

Having a written protocol in place for emergencies:
If your illness is of the type that might require emergency treatment, you could ask your doctor or nurse specialist to write a protocol for you to take to the Emergency Department with you. For example, if you are known to have a certain type of seizure that responds well to particular medications, this could all be put in writing, with a copy given to your local ED and another copy for you to carry around with you. In the UK, it's possible for patients to be 'flagged' with the local ambulance service, so that any paramedics called out are prepared with relevant information. MedicAlert tags and cards (and equivalent) also provide valuable information if you're not able to give details to those treating you.

Be prepared:
If you can, try to predict things that might go wrong. It's not unrealistic to think that someone with gastroparesis might have a bad flare in which they can't eat or drink, and so need IV hydration and anti-sickness medications (and possibly also gastric decompression and artificial nutrition).

The more difficult cases arise when those unpredictable flare-ups occur. Either unrelated illnesses that worsen the underlying condition, or new symptoms.

In this case, it is important to act as sensibly as possible. Get advice, either from your own healthcare providers or from someone who knows you well, rather than from an overworked out-of-hours or emergency physician, in the first instance.

If the answer is that you need medical intervention (or at least assessment), the next question is when? Can you wait until you are able to see your own doctor? Is there anything more that you can do at home to keep things as stable as possible while you wait?

If the answer to 'when?' is 'now', then you have to ask 'where?' -
1. Out of hours GP service
2. Walk-in (or minor injuries) unit
3. Emergency Department (perhaps by ambulance, if necessary)

So, what are you waiting for:
Do you need help?
When do you need help?
Where are you going to get this help?

And with that, I am going to take another dose of my rescue medications now in the hope that I can delay needing help from my own doctor until tomorrow, when she is next in clinic.

Wish me luck!

This post was written as part of NHBPM - 30 health posts in 30 days: http://bit.ly/vU0g9J

Countdown to Christmas: Part 2

Welcome to the second installment in Jo's Christmas preparations!

Right now, I imagine that Christmas is not the first thing on the minds of my dear friends in the States. For your sakes, this is a low-key week of preparations. I know that you have Thanksgiving coming up, and hope that you can all enjoy the reminder to feel thankful without feeling unhappy or stressed by the occasion.

I have to confess that I'm not feeling particularly festive, and really don't feel like making preparations. I have lots of appointments this week, but I am going to push myself to get at least a few things done, otherwise I know that I'll struggle nearer the time. Murphy's law dictates that I will end up in hospital during the whole of my last minute preparation time if I leave things too late. Actually, I'll probably be in hospital anyway (gotta love hospital wi-fi and online shopping!) but at least it's one thing off my mind if I'm up to date with my Christmas preparations.

I spent three weeks out of the four leading up to my wedding in hospital, which would have been somewhat stressful if we hadn't got most of the organising done months in advance, so I'm a big advocate for forward-planning. Those of us with chronic illness have to make the most of our good days so that we can focus on nothing but taking care of ourselves when we have bad days.

So what am I doing this week?

1. Ordering gifts online: There are some good deals around at the moment (I got 25% off most of the presents I ordered on Friday), especially with Black Friday coming up. Amazon are promoting their Black Friday deals, some of which look very good. I'm trying to consolidate all my orders so that I get all my Amazon gifts (and gifts from other websites) ordered at the same time, rather than having to go back and forth to the same sites with repeat orders. This is where the list that I made last week is particularly handy!

2. Making sauces, jams and chutneys: Cranberry sauce will freeze nicely until we're ready to use it. Jams are designed to be stored, and chutneys are considerably better if they have a few weeks to mature and develop their flavours. This year I plan to make a spiced apple chutney (it's an old favourite that I make every year, and never seem to be able to make enough to satisfy everyone!), sparkly plum jam (with edible glitter), cranberry sauce, and some sort of cranberry and apple jelly. The apples for the chutney are already cooked and stored in the freezer, so the chutney preparation will be low-effort - just adding the flavours.

3. Still plodding away at the Christmas cards: Helen (over at the Creaky Girl blog) suggested mail-merging addresses to print out onto sticky labels for the cards. I am definitely going to do this! The strength in my hands isn't great, and I get a lot of pain and illegible handwriting after a short time, so it seems sensible to conserve my hand function for the message, rather than wasting it writing names and addresses onto envelopes. As Helen rightly pointed out, it's quite a lot of effort initially, but I will be able to use the list again and again. Wish I'd done that for our wedding invitations and thank you cards!

4. Wrapping presents: We have a theme every year. This year it's brown paper with brightly-coloured ribbon and the names of the recipients stamped onto the paper. I haven't decided whether I'm going to emboss the names or not. I'll see how much my wrists hurt after wrapping. Thank goodness for sellotape dispensers! I have different boxes for the wrapped presents, depending on where they're going - thankfully this year we only have two stops on our Christmas tour, but in previous years we've had four or five stops, with a corresponding number of boxes. Once the boxes are filled, they're ready to sit until we leave for our Christmas tour, when they can be lifted straight into the boot of the car. Easy!

Wrapping paper theme for Christmas 2011 - brown paper and ribbon

5. Choosing (and ordering online) the wine for Christmas Day: We are spending Christmas with Richard's family up in the North West this year. We've been told that we don't need to help with the meal, as we'll be doing a lot of traveling, but Richard will make his traditional chocolate roulade and I'll bring chutneys and jams, which is a good tactical move, as I want to contribute something, but probably won't be much more use than a bump on a log after all the traveling! We've also offered to choose and bring the wine for Christmas Day. It's fun to choose wine to go with each course, with sherry to start and port to finish. We put money aside each month during the year as a 'wine fund', so this isn't an extra Christmas expense, thankfully.

6. Starting to buy and wrap the presents for Richard's stocking: We make stockings for each other every year, and they follow very specific rules:

• Chocolate coins and an orange (Richard has a chocolate orange because he doesn't like real ones!)
• Something to eat
• Something to read
• Something pretty
• Something useful
• Something to wear
• Something to listen to
• Something to play with

And that's all for this week. I'm desperate to start making the Christmas playlist for my iPhone, but I'm holding off for as long as possible. I make the same mistake every year, starting the Christmas music too early and then finding myself utterly jaded and sick of it by mid-December. But not this year - this year will be the year that I break that trend!

This post was written as part of NHBPM - 30 health posts in 30 days: http://bit.ly/vU0g9J